Episode 3 transcript: Vision boards, Paris, and Passion with Diana Sfera

Episode 3: Vision boards, Paris, and Passion with Diana Sfera

Podcast Introduction

We often hear people wishing us a long, happy, and healthy life. But what if the length isn't what matters most? What if instead, it's the breath, depth, and purpose of each day that matters most? Welcome to the Live the Width of Your Life podcast. My name is Aneta Ardelian kuzma. Join me weekly as I interview guests who make changes in their own lives to live more fully with intention, gratitude, and joy. Be prepared to be inspired by their stories of how they shifted their mindset, took courageous action, and designed the life that they always wanted to live.

Guest Bio

Today's guest is Diana Sfera. Diana is a marketer and creative strategist who has worked for nearly two decades, which some of the top creative agencies in the industry setting the vision behind strategic campaigns and initiatives for iconic. Beauty, lifestyle, and luxury brands, as well as new brands making their way into the world. As a hybrid strategist and creative, her mission is to find a brand's soul and make it a tangible thing. Who are they? What's their purpose? And bring it all to life in a world driven by nonstop creative consumption, in an effort to live in her own purpose. Diana recently followed a dream and relocated to Paris one year ago where she continues to serve. All over the world.

Aneta: Hi! Diana, welcome to the podcast. Thanks for joining me.

00:04.69

Diana: Hi! Aneta, thank you so much for helping me. This is so exciting!

00:07.45

Aneta: It's so exciting! Diana is dialing in and calling us in from Paris for those that are listening via podcast and not watching it on Youtube. She has an amazing backdrop behind her in Paris. Diana and I have known each other for many years. Our families are close friends, and I'm grateful to consider you a friend. I have just admired your journey. I've loved watching what you've done in your career and your personal life and all of the courageous choices that you have made, so when you agreed to be on the podcast, I was just so overjoyed.

Diana: Thank you! I Feel honored to be on the podcast.

00:54.90

Aneta: I know your story will be inspiring on so many different levels. For those that don't know Diana Sfera, tell us a little bit more about your background and what you'd like to share with the audience.

Diana: Sure! So, up until recently, I was born and raised living in New York and Brooklyn. The last eight years, and as we mentioned, we go way back. My family is a first generation in the US from Eastern Europe. So I grew up very much in that sort of European spirit, working in communications and marketing as a Creative Strategist. A few years ago, I went and took a leap and went on my own, so I have been figuring out and exploring that journey and last year around this time. I packed up the Brooklyn apartment I had lived in for eight years and decided to take another leap and move to Paris.

02:04.54

Aneta: So, let's start with the most recent because I think that you've mentioned that you moved to Paris and grew up in New York, so tell us about the day or maybe what led up to your decision to decide that you going to leave New York for temporarily or perhaps for longer and to take the leap and to move out of the country and move to Paris of all places?

Diana: Fortunately for me, fortunately for me. I've had a lot of opportunities to travel over the course of my life. I studied abroad in Florence, Italy, when I was at Boston University, and that's when I got bit by the bug. It was when I decided I would travel everywhere I could for the rest of my life. I knew in my heart that there was something magical about being in Europe and that I was meant to return. It's how I grew up, and it's just that everything clicked and made sense, and it wasn't until I went on a trip with some girlfriends to the South of France. Almost ten years ago, we rented a car. We traveled through the South and passed through Paris, and there was something about France.

03:28.95

Diana: Specifically, that just spoke to my soul, and I have been living this french lifestyle. My whole life, people joked like you were more French than some of us here in Paris. It was in 2019. I came here by myself because I would visit my friend in London. I would always take the train here, and I met one friend. It was the first friend I had in Paris. I always said, you always come here as a tourist, and I want to meet that one friend.

Diana: Lucky enough to meet my friend Maude when I met her. She said you know your soul is French. It would help if you moved here, and it was during the pandemic. I kept thinking about that, and one day, I was sitting. We're all sitting alone doing different projects and thinking about things, and I made this vision board. On this vision board, I had a picture of my little house somewhere in the countryside of France and an apartment in Paris as I sat working every day remotely. I would stare at this vision board. Finally, I decided I would keep looking at it, or was I going to leap and do this? The silver lining of covid and the world has changed how we work. I was able to fulfill this dream.

05:00.80

Aneta: Well, I believe in vision boards as well, and I love that you were clear on what you wanted and could stare at it all the time and then decide to make the change. So, when you decided that you were going to do this and you were going to decide to move to Paris, were there things that you were considering that would be difficult or roadblocks or something that made you hesitate to make the decision? And were there things that you thought would be easier that ended up being more complicated?

Diana: Everything scared me and felt like a roadblock. Everything from what kind of Visa do I even need to apply for? How do I get the Visa? Who will help me with that? Where am I going to live? How do I find an apartment? I Don't speak French. How am I going to do this? I had no idea what I was doing. I just started doing my research, and I'm a true believer that when you want something in your life. Suddenly, the universe opens these doors to you.

Diana: And send you helpers. I had a helper. She was a friend of mine. Her name's Jen. I called her my guardian angel. Actually, during Covid, I had never met her in my life, but she had done this. She's a makeup artist and lives between Paris and New York and doing What I wanted to do?

Diana: She would get on the phone with me for an hour and tell me everything I needed to do and how to do it. Give me her advice. By leaning on people and researching, I could figure out a roadmap to make this work. But then, when you get here. It's still like the reality you have to face is that you just have to hit the road bumps and things. I had yet to learn how hard it would be to find an apartment. It took me five months to find a place to live.

07:00.95

Aneta: Right. All more rest.

Diana: I filled out so much paperwork. You would have thought I was adopting a child in France, but it was just to rent a small studio apartment. I was living in a hotel Airbnb simultaneously, applying for my Visa and having to fly back to New York. I had 2 suitcases with me and thought I'd be returning much sooner to take care of my Visa. I just had summer stuff and winter was coming. Suddenly, I had to build and buy a coat and warm clothes. So, it was definitely a journey to get here and get settled in. But it's just taking it as it comes. You realize that everything is solvable and you're going to get through the bumps, and if it's meant to be, those doors will continue to open, and the barriers will start to move.

08:07.43

Aneta: It's so true, Marie Forleo has her book called "Everything is figureoutable," and she says that all the time, and I love it. I found that once you decide to make the leap, as you said, people suddenly come to help or things are opening up, or there might be something you consider a lucky break or a coincidence. But it really starts with that first decision to make the leap. Often, before you're ready like you did. You feel like you had maybe the next couple of steps figured out, but there were still so many other things you still needed to figure out.

Diana: No, I had no idea what I was doing. My parents would be like do you know how to handle X, Y, and Z? I'm like no! I'm figuring it out. But that's part of the journey, right? It's like, There are things that we can map out. There are things we can read about. You can ask people for advice but you just kind of have to get into it and then figure it out as you go and the solutions they always come up with. 

09:13.22

Aneta: You said, you wanted to be there for a year. You're going to give a year a try. How long have you been in Paris?

Diana: I'm happy to say, it will be my one-year anniversary next week. Thank you! It's wild. I've given it a year. Honestly, the most exhilarating year of my life was not without challenges. It's also been incredibly hard at times. But I feel like the journey in a way has almost just begun. I will continue on this path and see where it takes me next.

09:57.87

Aneta: Okay, so does that mean you're staying in Europe for a little longer?

Diana: Renewing the Visa for another year. 

10:07.36

Aneta: Okay, all right! That's good to hear. Diana, what have you learned about yourself? So you moved, you're very adventurous, independent and successful in life. You moved by yourself to Paris. You had one friend, Maude. You finally found an apartment. You're working. I know that your work allowed you to make the move over to Paris but what have you discovered about yourself? How have you grown in the past year and changed?

Diana: I guess I've discovered that I'm pretty resilient and I think I always knew that a little bit about myself, but I didn't realize how resilient I was. It's funny, I was talking with a friend who's also moved here from LA actually and she said you know, people think because it's Paris, so you're moving to Paris so cool right? It's not hard because it's cool.

Diana: But it's very hard to leave the life that you know and go into a new country and start all over again without your network and your friends. Don't you know how anything's going to work? You don't even know the language. There were times that I took a step back and was like it's pretty amazing that you've done this. Even for myself, I've surprised myself with this step I took because it was always just this dream and the fact that it's happening. I Still sometimes can't believe it. Thank you!

11:50.31

Aneta: Well, It is happening because I'm following your adventures on Instagram. One of the things I've seen in the past year although always in your life. Your travel is such a huge part of your life. It's a passion of yours. So, talk to us a little bit about the way Europeans approach travel and what you've been able to do now that you live in Paris.

Diana: I think what I've always loved about the European mentality is that they really appreciate not only their culture but all cultures. So many of the friends I have here are just very international.

Diana: A lot of them have actually lived in New York for some time. Doing work in New York and many have you know come from Denmark. I have a friend from Denmark. I have a friend from Brazil like friends from all over the place. But very much the mentality is that here you can live in Paris and be in Paris or you can go live in Portugal or over the next week you can decide, hey, I just want to go for one month only. Rent a place in Barcelona. So, I think there's just something really exciting about that mentality. 

Diana: They're not so fixed. There's always this desire to just be tapped into other places and other cultures. I think living here too. It's just that it's easy to get to places. I mean, I always joke that everything's like 2 hours from Paris. Every flight I book is 2 hours from Paris. If you can find a flight for not that much and it's 2 hours away. You can be in a new country tomorrow, and there's something so exciting about that way of living.

13:39.82

Aneta: Absolutely, tell us about some of the recent places that you've visited while you've been there.

Diana: I was in Portugal last week meeting with some friends and in Lisbon. It was beautiful and I was very fortunate enough a friend of mine had his birthday in

Diana: Marrakesh is in Morocco, and I've never been there before so just from a design standpoint, the food, the colors, and the culture. It just kind of blew my mind going to Morocco but I mean Mallorca.

Diana: I have friends in London. London's easy to get to. That's just the tip of the iceberg. I think there are so many other countries in Europe that I have not even been to yet and it just feels super easy and accessible.

14:36.80

Aneta: One of the things that I love to see too, and I'm constantly reminded I've traveled, and I always love to see the aesthetics of Europe and Paris and other places. But I'm reminded through your feed when I watch it that you'll walk into a European store, and It's beautiful. 

Aneta: Talk to me a little bit about what it's like to have your senses in technicolor everything smells and sights. You know the food I mean all of it right? It seems amazing.

Diana: It's incredible, I mean almost so much. When I came here I had a croissant maybe every day and I said okay, there's a thing called diet and health. I got to maybe not have chocolate in the pastries every day. It's just, especially in Paris. Everything is done so beautifully. Everything's so curated, even the way people dress. There's this elegance and simplicity to the style here. Where they don't go overboard. Everything's just beautifully done. 

Diana: I think what I love about Europe and France as well as it's not always about new and fast fashion and new furniture. It really is that they respect antiques and beautiful paintings. Vintage is huge here. I'm kind of diving into and exploring this sort of new design sensibility being here and it's something that I've always loved, so I just feel like a kid in a candy store in Europe. Surrounded by so many beautiful things.

16:23.12

Aneta: Absolutely, we know the things you love about Europe. You are a New York girl and Brooklyn. Tell me about some of the things that you might miss from back home.

Diana: Well, I miss my family and my friends who I consider to be family members to me. I'm very very close with my parents and my sister and so it's been hard being away from them.

Diana: Although, they did come and visit recently which was just amazing. I miss them. I miss the energy of New York. Sometimes New York can be crazy as we know, but there's something about the New York sort of grit and attitude. It's just so much a part of who I am. Actually, I try to carry that with me even when I'm having moments here. Where I'm feeling I don't know, like a little bit disconnected from myself or feeling a little homesick. It's like, I remember the New York in me. 

Diana: There's something special about living here but at home is still such a big part of who I am.

Aneta: Absolutely, so you have such an adventurous spirit. You're independent. I want you to take us a little bit back. I know you went to school in Boston and you didn't always work for yourself and chose to live in another country 

17:53.82

Aneta: So, tell us a little bit more about your earlier days. Did you follow a more traditional path initially? How did you get to where you are today?

Diana: I mean, even the way I found Pr. I had no idea what I wanted to do when I went to college. I'm always impressed by people who go to college and they're like I want to do this for the rest of my life. It's like how do you know what you want to do? 

18:20.11

Diana: I would say to be you, It was a great school and I felt this tremendous pressure of like what am I going to pick and do forever? A friend of mine said you know what? You really loved planning events and telling stories, and I think, You'd be good at PR so let's give that a shot of Pr.

Diana: Haphazardly fell into people. I obviously found my passion in it. After college, I went back to New York and applied and did all the internships. While I was in school and then I was out of school, I got this great position at a top agency in New York.

Diana: It changed my life because it gave me the skills I needed and It was hard. It was fast-paced but it really kind of set me up for everything that I needed to learn. Then, you kind of just get in the path. You're moving along and you're sort of following the journey that we're told, especially living in New York. It's like you got to get the promotion. You got to get the bigger title you've got to get more pay. You've got to get a bigger office and so that sort of became the thing that I was obsessed with for so long.

19:35.26

Diana: My twenties were like, what's the title? What's the job? How do I get to the next level? Then I got to a point and I think it was like, maybe my early thirties where I'd been working all the time. And making other people very very happy and very wealthy, but I had hit a point where I was at this super senior level and yet I didn't feel content. There was something that didn't feel right to me. It started to almost like suck the soul out of me. After a while, I was just kind of going through the motions. What I realized is, I was working for the wrong things. I was working on a title I was working for.

Diana: But I wasn't doing the work for myself in a way that worked for me and made me happy. I was doing it for everybody else, and so that was sort of the wake-up call for me, and it changed how I looked at and continue to look at my career and the thing that I choose to spend time doing with my life. 

20:52.88

Aneta: Did you find yourself burned out?

Diana: Yes, I was very burnt out. I was working late hours and I think again this is why I love Europe. In New York, you're required to work on the weekend. If you have to work on the weekend. People can call you all hours of the night and that's just the expectation of you no matter what you're doing. You could be at a family function and you just had to drop everything and do the job.

Diana: And if you didn't, It was like you were a failure. You're not living up to what you're supposed to be? I just got tired of feeling guilty all the time that I wasn't doing enough and I didn't know why I was doing it anymore. It actually took the joy away from the thing I Love to do because I like the work and I like the people but I was missing the joy in all of that.

21:51.11

Aneta: I hear this so often and I experienced it myself. What did you notice about your health? Did you notice that this was starting to have an impact on you not just mentally but physically as well?

Diana: Yeah, I did. There was a point where I felt like my skin. I kept having these breakouts on my skin and I kept going to the derm being like I don't get it. I'm not doing anything different. I just felt tired all the time. I just really did feel the burnout in my body. I didn't feel healthy and I didn't have time for things. I mean I barely had time to go on dates or to meet friends. I wasn't able to travel as much as I wanted to. So, I just think it was at that point that I decided, Okay, I'm going to change how I do this.

22:48.69

Aneta: Yeah, and so you did. You made the decision right? to go out on your own were you scared at all you did do it anyway.

23:00.30

Diana: Terrified! I did it anyway and I'll tell you I went out on my own. I remember I had a conversation with my mom and she said you know you can do this for yourself. You just got to get 1 or 2 clients and you're off like.

23:15.47

Aneta: I love that! I love that your mom said that.

Diana: That's it. Yeah, she's Amazing. So, She was really the one that kind of pushed me. I was like not even thinking about it. I'm like you know what? you're right, I can do this for myself. So, I got that client and then that's when I decided. Okay, I'm going to give my leave at work and stay very very close even with that agency and continue to consult for them. I go off on my own and a few weeks into it. The one client I have says, you know what? can't really afford this and they were gone.

Diana: I just gave up my amazing role and a lot of this big role at my last agency. And now, I don't have a client but how am I going to pay my rent? Yeah, there were freakout moments but what I have learned is that freaking out isn't going to change the scenario. It's actually going to get worse because then you're in a frantic state that if you just kind of like somehow remain calm other opportunities will come.

Diana: Actually, the opportunity that came through at that point was an interior design opportunity. It's something I always wanted to try and I had actually just finished meditation and sitting on a bench in Brooklyn and a friend of mine as it opened my eyes. She texted me and said, I know this is random but there's an architect who needs help decorating an apartment in Manhattan. I recommended you and I said, you know what? I'm just going to do it. I started doing that. I felt the joy come back. I was doing that, and other opportunities started to come and then other opportunities because it was just like in this new flow state.

25:13.13

Aneta: Inflow, Your energy was probably really high and you were saying, Yes! to opportunities that were presenting themselves. So, what did it feel like to work for yourself to start doing? Things that maybe you hadn't considered to get new clients on what does that feel like? Is it Freedom? Is it peace? what did it feel like to you?

Diana: To me, it mostly felt like freedom. It was exciting and exhilarating for me to design the way in which I wanted to work. Even if it was just freeing and this was pre Covid to go sit at my favorite coffee shop and do work. Sit in a park, work on my projects, or whatever. So, I think even that alone is like the fact that I could choose where I wanted to work. I didn't have to commute every day and do all those things that were so freeing.

Diana: There are other things that you have to be mindful of that can also be scary I didn't realize that there are some periods where you're not going to get work as easily because it's the holidays or it's summer and nobody's working and Wow! Okay, so that means I have to go harder in the fall so that I have this cushion. If God forbid. The holidays come and there's no work. So, the good and the bad, I mean there are ups and downs with everything but mostly I felt really really happy during that time.

26:46.45

Aneta: Wonderful! After you did that, you took a big chance on yourself. Do you feel like that was the beginning of more opportunities to start challenging? Maybe the status quo or challenging assumptions about what life should look like on other people's terms?

Diana: Yeah, I think it was the start of yet a challenge. What do you think you should be doing and how you're doing it? they should, right? like and even though you know after some time after that I did end up. During the pandemic going back full-time to a company, I had worked for before. I felt like I was going into it because I wanted to go back into it and when I was in it I felt like I was doing it for myself and so it changed. How do I look at any opportunity that comes up now? I just ask myself, do I like this work? Do I like the people I'm doing it with? Does it feel good? Do I like how I'm doing it? If I feel good about all 3 of those things then that feels right to me.

27:50.87

Aneta: Yeah. So, what are you most passionate about in terms of what you can do in your career?

Diana: I'm just really passionate about staying in a very creative space. I think as you get higher and higher, you kind of learn what you like and what you don't like. What I realized I didn't love as much when I got to the top. Especially of these bigger agencies is all the Bureaucracy. You know all the things you have to do within the company but are taking you further away from the work. I realized I wanted to be more of a specialist. A, I really focus on Creative Strategy which is what I do for brands, and B, I always want to stay connected to the work.

Diana: I don't want to feel like I'm just kind of Managing logistics or paperwork. I really want to be hands-on and always feel like I'm in some state of creation.

29:00.62

Aneta: I remember when I left my job and I was starting to build my business and I called you or I texted you. I'm like, hey, do you have time to chat with me? I know you've worked on brands and I know I'm not your ideal client. But. You know, can you talk to me for a couple of minutes and give me some advice? You were so gracious and you spent so much time talking to me and asking me questions. It really made me think about who I am? and what my brand is. and then even provide some a template and tools that you share with your clients. I want to thank you for that.

29:36.48

Aneta: But just to say I loved walking through that experience with you and I could tell that you are so good at what you do, You're well.

Diana: Thank you! Well, I'm glad it helped. I mean, it looks like two years later we're doing this podcast together. So yeah, 3 ½ years! lost track of time.

29:56.42

Aneta: I know it's so crazy. So, the title of this podcast is Live the Width of your life and it's from a Diane Akerman quote. It's something that I try to do for myself is to live the width and not just the length but what does that mean to you and how do you live the width of your own life?

Diana: Well. Yeah, So I think what that means for me is I think consistently taking a moment to sort of ask myself. Is what I'm doing at this time actually bringing joy to my life? What I mean about that is there are things we end up doing ourselves, including where you just kind of get in it and you're kind of just going through the motions. You don't feel like it's necessarily bringing you joy. You think it should be right because it's like the cool thing to do or sometimes even find myself in a scenario like this the cool Crowd. You should be with and then you're like I don't like this feeling at all. Why am I here? 

Diana: I think that living the Width of your life is to really be honest with yourself about what makes you happy. I think it's different for everybody. As for my friend, Happiness is being at home with her kids and doing stuff with their kids. For other people, You know, cooking or whatever it is. It's just I think it's so easy to put yourself in a position or get lost in the things that we think are cool and look like happiness to other people but aren't really feeding your own happiness.

Diana: I think that's like a lesson I've learned. Even if it means. you know seem dorky to people. This is what makes me happy to do it. So, I think that's true for me at least the meaning of Living the full Width of your Life.

32:04.29

Aneta: Absolutely! Thank you so much. Diana. I love that! And I love the idea of looking inward, going back to what is most important to you, and then claiming that as your own for your life. So. Thank you for spending time with us today. How can we best support you? Where can people follow you? So, they see your adventures as well.

Diana: Yes, well most of my adventures play out on Instagram so my handle @ladysfera, and there are potentially some new things on the horizon. So, hopefully, I'll relay that through my social feed and maybe potentially start a new one at some point so more to come. 

32:50.99

Aneta: Fantastic! I'll include that in the show notes. If you're watching or listening and you like today's episode. Please rate it, share it with friends who will find the story inspirational, and subscribe so that you're notified every time there's a new episode. Thank you so much for joining me, Diana, and continued success to you.

Diana: Thank you so much!