Episode 26 transcript: How I met Wonder Woman on a rooftop in L.A.

Podcast Introduction:

Cat: Each of us is destined to figure out who we are, where we are, why we're there, and if we're having a struggle, for example, right? Emotional eating was a big struggle for learning. How do we work through the emotions? But the bigger thing is actually how do we see ourselves and love ourselves right, where we are? And it's not even loving ourselves. It's loving each other. And this is, I think one of the most important aspects of being a coach is that we're loving our clients where they are, but we're also loving and holding space for them in terms of where they could go.

[00:00:30] Aneta: We often hear people wishing us a long, happy, and healthy life. But what if the length isn't what matters most? What if instead? It's the breath, depth, and purpose of each day that matters most. Welcome to the Live the Width of Your Life podcast. My name is Aneta Ardelian Kuzma. And join me weekly as I interview guests who made changes in their own lives to live more fully with intention, gratitude, and joy. Be prepared to be inspired by their stories of how they shifted their mindset. Took courageous action and designed the life that they always wanted to live.

[00:01:05] I'm so excited for you to listen to today's episode with my friend Cat Caldwell Myers. Cat is such a force. She is a podcast host of Horses, Mountains, and Dogs, which just came out at the end of the year. She's a transformational coach, a horse whisperer, a girl mama, and just one of the most amazing people in this world. Our conversation could have gone on for hours. We talked about how she and I met at a Cathy Heller retreat in LA, a couple of months ago. What our superpowers are, the power of breath work, the amazing work that she does on her retreats and in her business. The power of connections, how to learn to love our bodies and ourselves, and what she learned about listening to her own body when she was sick and realized that the kindest thing for herself was to rest and not to try to power through. This episode is just packed with so much goodness, and I think that you will recognize just how much great affection and adoration we have for one another. So take a listen and I hope that you'll check out Cat's podcast afterward.

Podcast Interview:

[00:02:21] Aneta: Hi Cat. Thank you so much for joining me today.

[00:02:25] Cat: Hi, Aneta. I'm so glad to be here.

[00:02:31] Aneta: So I'm so excited to get into your story, but I did want to just share with everyone that we met at a Cathy Heller event couple of weeks ago in LA, and for me, I've been following Cathy, I've been an alumna of one of her other programs. And I remember getting the email, it was less than two weeks before the retreat that she was doing, and it was a crazy discount for alumni. And I looked at flights, I looked at the hotel, and it was one of those moments in time where the universe says, you just got to go. And so I opened myself up, I told my husband, I think I'm going. Seems a no-brainer. And I didn't know anybody, there was no way to connect to anyone. And then you were actually the very first person I met the morning of the retreat on the rooftop at the pool thinking that I was going to be the first nerd to be there when the doors opened. I know. And then there you were in your awesome superman dress and this red shawl. And I was, she is so going to be my friend.

[00:03:39] Cat: Well, I'm back at you because I have to explain to people what you were wearing and that I knew you had to be there for Cathy Heller, cause you had this awesome green and black dress with this pretty sort of pink patterned. I mean, just gorgeous put outside in the sunshine. And I thought she's got to be here for Cathy Heller.

[00:04:01] Aneta: Isn't that so funny? I love when things just happen the way that they do. And of course, then we are inseparable for the two magical days. But we will talk more about that. I want, for those that don't know you to tell us a little bit about you and your background, because you've got an amazing story too.

[00:04:21] Cat: The truth is, I was thinking about this the other day. All of us have so many titles and so many things that we've done. And it's that dress I was wearing is, it's actually superwoman, right? It was just we're not superwomen though. And I feel sometimes when we talk about what we do, we can get really sort of in that idea of, this is all I am, right? Like the business card kind of idea. Yes. And the truth is, I mean, I love the title of your podcast, but the width, the depth, we are all so much more than that, and also so much less than that but, my passion is really to help others transform. I call myself a transformation coach, but I love connecting people to the heart and soul of why they came here. And sometimes I feel my greatest gift is connecting us back to our history or our ancestors, the things that were important to our grandparents, the things that we hope will be important to our grandchildren or children. I do a lot of work with animals. I do a lot of work in nature, and professionally my coaching expertise is weight loss and health and fitness. Registered dietician. I've done a lot of different work in those fields professionally and also worked as a Montessori teacher. I'm a horse trainer and a dog trainer. I have kids. Lots of different things I love to do.

[00:05:45] Aneta: And I see the pictures of the horses behind you, and you live in this magical, gorgeous home. So how did you start, I guess what was your background with horses? When did you come to love horses and how do you use them in your business today?

[00:06:01] Cat: Great question. So my grandmother and today is actually her 90 plus one birthday.

[00:06:07] Aneta: Happy birthday. What do you call your grandmother?

[00:06:10] Cat: I call her grandmother.

[00:06:11] Aneta: Grandmother. Lovely. Happy birthday to your grandmother.

[00:06:14] Cat: Very formal. We actually make a lot of jokes about her and the, recently deceased Queen of England. She was 95 and passed at 96. And my grandmother grew up with horses and I grew up with my grandmother. So every summer I lived out west and we would come here to the Chicago area and spend one week with her. And it was called Grandmother's Week. And my sister and I, we were both really horse crazy. This was one of the best weeks of the year. And, my grandmother just taught me how to relate to horses, brush them, lead them, be comfortable around them. Just sort of a natural way of life with them. And, over time, actually, this is very funny because my mother did not get the horse gene.

[00:06:58] Aneta: She didn't. That's so funny.

[00:07:01] Cat: My grandmother had five daughters and they had lots of horse pictures on the wall of them doing little competitions with their ponies growing up. They grew up in Ohio, right?

[00:07:12] Cat: Around the Cincinnati area. Dayton. Dayton and Cincinnati. Anyhow, long in the short of it is that my mom, who is the oldest, wanted to be a ballerina. And so she traded her sister for a pony with a Guinea pig. At least they kept it in the family, right?

[00:07:30] Cat: Because I grew up from a long line of horse lovers, so I think my sister and I, we were nine and 11 years old when we went around the neighborhood and sold all of our toys and stuffed animals, some of them for a dollar and they were worth more than that. Trying to make money for horses. So this goes way, way back. We've been horse crazy from the get-go and I started working professionally around age 12 for a horse barn. I spent every weekend out at the barn in exchange for all of my lessons and training and started getting paid to work with people with horses. Really as a teenager is when I started doing that. Lots of crazy horse stories I could tell you, but I don't know how many. I mean, so to get to the point, how do I use horses now, and what's my life with horses? Now here we have three horses on the property and I think of our horses a little bit as a black beauty muse, right? So some people they're more drawn to horses than others, right? For some people, it's more of a metaphor. And they might be familiar with some of the black beauty stories, but they've never actually encountered a real horse. So each of our horses has a different personality. Right?

[00:08:44] Cat: And we'll use them to talk about, hey, where are you resisting? Where are you jet here, where he's going? I don't think I want to go any further. Where are you resisting? And then where are you tiki, where you're being really brave and you want to go maybe a little farther, a little faster. But how to proceed? So we use them, metaphorically just putting your hand on a horse energetically and it's the same with working with dogs. We do a lot of work with dogs, but it'll bring your blood pressure down, right? All of that good stuff. So we do a lot of just being around them. We've done, meditations with the horses. We've worked through getting people on horses for the first time, bareback. We've done lessons, we've done all kinds of different things. But at the core, it's really just about being around them. All the things my grandmother taught me to do, being comfortable learning to pick up after them.

[00:09:37] Aneta: It's so interesting because I've been to a place that has horses recently, a horse farm, and they really are magical. There is something you said when you feel very grounded. First of all, they're so big, if you haven't grown up around horses, which I haven't, when I walked in, I was just taken aback by how majestic they are. They are so big, and then they've got those big eyes that I know they're so big and I felt it could see right into my soul. And there was something soothing and relaxing about just touching the horse and earning its trust to allow me to just sort of stroke it and, so I could see why. I know that there's a lot of work with trauma, people who've experienced trauma. But you mentioned that you're, a coach that works on weight loss and dietician, but also I know people with eating disorders and other issues as well. So, do you use horses with some of the weight loss programs that you do as well?

[00:10:33] Cat: So some of it we've done some virtual work with the horses. I could walk you outside right now, and you could see them. There is something that happens when you just see a horse here. An image of course. When you see an actual live horse, there's something a little bit more that happens. An organic connection. Yeah. But it is not the same as being in their energetic field. One of the things I have worked on a little bit, and there's an amazing woman I follow, Linda Kohanov, who has done a lot of work. She's written The Tao of Equus, The Power of the Herd, and a lot of different things. And she has these spiritual horse cards called The Way of the Horse.

[00:11:16] Cat: I've used them with my herd, I've used them with my clients. It is the next best thing for virtual readings because Herd. Yep. It's a herd of about 40 horses that you get to connect with on your spiritual journey. They're not actually in the space with you, but you start to get to know them. And I know these cards so well. That each of them speaks to some different aspect of horses, right? So that's what I've found really helpful. When I have brought people to the horses, I always say the horses are bigger than our problems. And they can carry them. So suddenly, whatever our problem was, we can just let it go. Right? because it's actually not that big. It's all in our minds. Like the unicorn. It's not even real. This one's real. This other thing it's not even real. It's just in our minds, right? Some folks, show up and they just start crying. It's just a complete release as soon as they're within their magnetic field. So the horses really do the work for us. I'm not a certified therapist, so I'm very guarded about opening up to folks who have really serious things going on on some level. But the horses are ready for that. So this is where at a certain point we're just a conduit. And when I take them down the trail, we're meeting people and who knows what their story is, but they're ready. They just touch and it's delivered

[00:12:45] Aneta: It's so amazing. I think that the older I get and the more life experience I have, I just don't have to know how things work. I really don't anymore. I'm so much operating more from a heart perspective and the head perspective. Because I do find that when I'm in my head it's never really good, it's usually some story that I've created. Some thoughts, we have these elaborate stories, but when you get into the heart, and I think maybe that's what happens when you're working with the horses you let go some of that other stuff and on some higher level of knowing and understanding that maybe it's not even within our comprehension. Sometimes we allow ourselves to heal. So yeah, I'm okay with not knowing how it works.

[00:13:26] Cat: Yeah. Well, this is where when we're really serving others, there's all this talk about our ideal client, right? and our dream client and blueprint and so on. But I think, especially when I'm working with horses and animals or working in nature, some of it is you're a conduit. You don't even know what the ideal is. The spirit is going to bring you together. And, sometimes it can be a really challenging situation, honestly. Not what you thought you signed up for.

[00:13:52] Aneta: Yeah. So tell me why you decided to go into nutrition and sort of body image and positivity and helping or healing people on their emotional journey with food because I don't know of many people who have not, who are either not still on that journey, I mean, myself included, or, aren't somehow healing from, pass backs, that experience with food. What have you found and what do you see as the greatest sense of healing that we should all know?

[00:14:21] Cat: Well if I could say just one thing, it would be, and it is very cliche, keep it simple. I think that we can get so complicated and it's interesting. Girls know what a diet is by the age of eight. Okay. I remember being at summer camp when I was probably about 10, and I was a little heavier. I was always a little heavier through the older child ages indefinitely into adolescence. I was always a bit heavier. And, these kids were picking me up and trying to throw me. And I remember this boy saying she's really heavy, so much heavier than we thought she was going to be. And they're all carrying me. And I remember thinking, I know heavy is bad.

[00:14:59] Aneta: Yeah. There's something wrong with me

[00:15:00] Cat: It’s bad, sausage rolls are bad, being fat is bad. What I didn't quite understand was how we attack ourselves. Right? And so much of it is in the mind. It's not even what's going on in your body, it's in your head. And diet culture, this obsession with body image that we have, especially in our culture. I got so depressed in adolescence that I actually took a semester off from a sport to do an intensive body project study. And I read everything that I could about it.

[00:15:34] Aneta: What is that? What do you mean by a body study?

[00:15:36] Cat: So there was a book at the time called The Body Project. I don't remember the name of the author, but a lot of interviews, with women of all ages. about their bodies and how they felt about their bodies. And I was suddenly able to see that it wasn't actually even about our bodies, it was just about what we think about our bodies. And how we feel about our bodies also affects how we show up. Right?

[00:16:01] Cat: And there's this culture of shaming, of people making judgments about other people's bodies. I'll never forget when I was getting back into fitness, this woman had this French accent, do you really think that they would want to do it with you? I mean, how you looked that time, I was postpartum and I was heavier and this woman hadn't known me when I wasn't heavier. I'm bouncing all over the place. But I remember when I owned and I can't tell you exactly the name of it for various reasons, but I owned one of the world's largest women's fitness franchises. Okay? It's for a 30-minute workout. And I remember going to one of our conventions and standing next to a woman who was rather large and thinking, how can you own a club and try to sell weight loss packages? And then she explained to me, yeah, I used to be 460 pounds. Two things. Number one, who am I to judge? Number two, you have no idea how far someone has come. Where they are and why, and where they're going. And ultimately who's in charge? Each of us, right?

[00:17:08] Cat: Each of us is destined to figure out who we are, where we are, why we're there, and if we're having a struggle. For example, emotional eating was a big struggle. Learning how we work through emotions, but the bigger thing is actually how we see ourselves and love ourselves right where we are. And it's not even loving ourselves, it's loving each other. And this is I think one of the most important aspects of being a coach is that we're loving our clients where they are but we're also loving and holding space for them in terms of where they could go.

[00:17:39] Aneta: Absolutely. I always wonder, how much energy I've spent in my life worrying about, five pounds, 10 pounds, etcetera. Also, we all have some sort of body dysmorphia because I remember one of my best friends, from growing up, said she was at her mom's house and she said, I have to send you this picture of when we were 16 and we were on vacation somewhere in Florida. And I remember not feeling confident in my body back then, and I was a tiny thing, right? I was 16 and I look at that picture now and if I looked like that, I'd be walking up and down the street in a bikini. It's so funny. But even then, you think about it and for some reason even then there was some standard or something else other than where I was, right now. And so do you feel you're in a place where you accept yourself and you love yourself as you are?

[00:18:30] Cat: What I will say is that I feel those toxic thoughts are part of life. And so this is where, when I say keep it simple, that's exactly what I'm talking about. So if you find yourself going, these don't fit, right?

[00:18:48] Cat: Said these don't fit, how can you turn it around? Like, crack up? I have so many pictures at this point because I coach this for others and I am able now to see it in myself for what is a waste of energy, a toxic thought. And is it really serving me to beat myself up? And the other thing I really think about a lot now is that I have two daughters. Going on five and seven, is it serving me? Is it serving them? Would it serve clients, right? And this isn't, the fake it till you make it. The thing comes up in my mind a little bit, but ultimately it's about really authentically embracing where we're at and being okay with it. So, yeah, I totally love myself right where I am, even in the moments where I don't. Right. Even in the moments where I've done some videos where I'll pull the camera up and do this thing, hey what's up with your chin?

[00:19:44] Cat: Unless we can claim a sense of humor about it right? With each other, and I've had a couple of people challenge me and ask, well, what about. This body confidence and fat love and all of those different things. And ultimately I feel, guess what? Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, right? Yeah. And it seems to me you have an opinion about it. And if you're asking for my opinion about it, my opinion is if it's working for them, great. Ultimately, who's to decide if it is or isn't working for somebody?

[00:20:22] Aneta: Yeah. I mean whether you're talking about whether some, you can love yourself and be positive in your body, even if someone else thinks that you're at an unhealthy weight or that it's somehow leading to unhealthy habits or Yeah.

[00:20:36] Cat: Or embracing unhealthy habits and so on. And again, I think for me, this is where coming back to keep it simple because it's interesting watching all four of my grandparents make it into their nineties. I just lost two of them last year. But seeing how they relate to food and how they think about it and what it looks to be healthy, but also some of the weird body dysmorphia that's been passed on. I mean, look at how body shapes have changed just in American culture, the six models, and all that stuff. For me, going back to keeping it really simple and what's, what's right for me, what's right for my kids, I want them to eat vegetables, I want them to understand portion control, right? And I don't want them to obsess about what they're eating. I don't want them to obsess about how they look. There are so many other things in the world beyond that this is just one small piece of the pie.

[00:21:31] Aneta: So true. I love that and I love that advice of keeping it simple. And, if you were to tell someone, maybe the top three to five things they could do, if they're struggling with some toxic thoughts or maybe they're in a bad place, what would you say are some of the things that they could do right now?

[00:21:47] Cat: Okay. My number one thing is to get into your body.

[00:21:50] Aneta: What does that mean?

[00:21:51] Cat: Get into your body. Guess what, it's the only one that you've got, right? So there are lots of different ways to get into your body. I know you're doing a breathwork certification.

[00:21:59] Aneta: Yes.

[00:22:00] Cat: You're going to talk about that?

[00:22:01] Aneta: Yes.

[00:22:02] Cat: Breathing at a minimum, right?

[00:22:06] Aneta: Yes.

[00:22:06] Cat: I love the Five Senses Meditation. They're very wonderful. That's something How is my body perceiving the world? Another one, but my favorite is exercise.

[00:22:18] Aneta: Okay. Any kind.

[00:22:19] Cat: Any kind, pretty much ideally the one you're most passionate about. And if you haven't found that yet, that's where we're going to start, right? That's where we're going to start. And the reason is, when you get stronger, the more of this you have. One pound of muscle burns, I think 50 calories an hour at rest. That makes a big difference. The other thing is it's going to give you so much energy throughout your day. Exercise is the best, and it can be really simple and small. And I watched my grandpa, Wiley exercising into his nineties. No, it's not going to look what it looked when we were strapping 14.

[00:22:56] Cat: It's not going to look what it looked when we were 14. It's not supposed to, our bodies are supposed to wax and wane what we're looking for as longevity. That's what we're looking for. And we want to keep walking and exercising until we die. And I mean, take Amy Purdy, who I was fortunate to get to chat with a bit at Heller's retreat and also during live chat, but you have no idea how long your body is going to be here and work for you and in what capacity. She lost her legs. She had the experience of having legs and then not having legs and continuing to literally dance with the stars. I think that was easy. No, but it happens because we keep going. And so with that consistency, with that exercise, you're going to be so much stronger. Not just physically, but mentally. It just changes everything for you.

[00:23:44] Aneta: Absolutely. I love those. I love that advice. So I want to talk about, Entrepreneurship a little bit and also maybe how you started, following Cathy and some of your experiences. I'm just going to give a little bit of the background. For me, I think it maybe was not during covid, I can't remember if it was 2021, or January of 2021. So I still think that things were a little bit different. And I remember being in business myself for about two years at that point, and I really was a little bit lonely. So I just felt I needed a community of other people who were seeking to build their own businesses, who were, solopreneurs. And I wanted something spiritual. I definitely knew that I wanted to focus on elevating my energy, my frequency, and my vibration and that by myself working in my office but alone was not going to necessarily do it. So that's what really, Cathy did for me. I don't even know how I first found her on Instagram, but I was, I love her energy. I listened to so many of her podcasts and she just drew me in. And so I did May to do it for 12 weeks and there was a shift in my mind, in my brain that went from, you do not have to sit here and grind and work crazy amounts of hours thinking that in depleting yourself again I did not want to go back to where I was in the corporate world. And that shift was so important to me. And I think it really helped me from burning out. It helped me from, becoming really overwhelmed in my business and when I was able to listen and to make the shifts and the strategies, she shared business strategies of course as well, but there was so much more about really feminine energy and leading from the heart and focusing in on this notion of receiving an abundance. And, I loved everything she was saying and it was very different than maybe some of the other business strategies that, I was listening to at the time. So tell me a little bit more about your experience or maybe what drew you to Cathy and then I absolutely want to hear about your experience at the retreat because you stayed after I was there in LA after my two days. And you stayed, how many days did you stay at her house For a private retreat with a small group?

[00:26:00] Cat: Three-day retreat. Yeah.

[00:26:01] Aneta: Okay. So what drew you to Cathy initially? And then, let's get into some of the details. Because I haven't heard any of it and I'm dying to hear

[00:26:11] Cat: Okay. Okay. So, I think to understand what brought me to Cathy, I have to tell a quick story about the state that I was in when I found Cathy. Long story short, I had this opportunity this summer to learn to drive a pony with a cart.

[00:26:28] Aneta: What do you mean? Like a pony with a cart.

[00:26:31] Cat: Pony with a cart person sitting in a cart behind Little Pony. And this pony belongs to my friend. The cart belongs to my friend. All of the knowledge belongs to my friend and her mother and their trainer and so on and so forth. And this is how a lot of people get started in different horse sports. You have someone who takes you along. And I showed up and helped groom a horse. And the next thing I know they were, hey, we want you to come and compete. Why don't you try this out? So I was, hey, why not? What an amazing opportunity. And I ended up, competing at the Villa Louie, which is in Prairie Duchen Wisconsin, and it's the largest pony carriage. They don't call them carts at the competition. They call them in the entire country. Okay.

[00:27:23] Cat: So I went to the biggest show in the country and they were all teasing me, may as well start big, right? And we were driving up there and this girlfriend and I met in birth class. Okay. So we were both pregnant with our first, and they were going around and they said, what do you do when you feel stressed, to bring down your stress? And she said, well, I just go out and pet my pony. And we're totally going to be friends. And we're right, we have sense. So, we are driving up there and we got the news that the queen had died. And it was just a really interesting moment because the Queen has done so much for horses around the world. She was a very passionate equestrian. I actually heard one interview with her headroom of 60 years who said if she wasn't the queen, then she would definitely have been a professional horse trainer. I've always just had this love and they call it the Royal Muse, the name of the bond, etcetera, etcetera. The royal family has given a lot of money and I didn't know any of this because I didn't know anything about marriages and, the cart before the horse and all of that stuff. I didn't understand. It was really fun to have that beginner's mind. And so it was interesting going into this and my grandmother did the same thing. She's never driven a pony cart and she was very excited that I was doing something new and all those things, and I was excited. It was just a fun way to do it. And I haven't been in a horse competition since my twenties. Right. It's just not something I really do anymore. Yeah. So the point is, I get up there, I do my first competition, my husband drives up with the kids, they miss it, fine, whatever. And I won.

[00:29:06] Cat: All right. Totally weird. And then there was a second competition the next day, which was a little bit more fun, but it was pouring. It was pouring rain. The kids got to watch. I did this thing called gambler's choice, which is sort of what it sounds like. It's really fun. And I won that one too, right? So, and then I got reserved championship just, what? And to be fair, I was working with a pony who knew his job. I have a lot of equestrian experience. A lot of it is energy, but a lot of it is visualization, right? Just knowing, all right, this is how I want it to go. This is what's going to happen. And then luck. And sometimes it just happens that way, right?

[00:29:47] Cat: So I came out of that experience and suddenly, I was just on fire, everything was working. I've been doing dog competitions for the first time, teaching my dog to do agility. We were acing everything. Everything's going great. And then Cathy Heller showed up. Okay. So I think understanding the space that I was in and that it just felt the ultimate flow when she showed and I started listening to the idea of doing a podcast. I had a radio show, which I loved doing my radio show back in Jackson Hole. And then, she showed up and I started listening to sort of the free series about starting a podcast. And I couldn't get it out of my head. And that weekend I was in a mastermind online, I don't remember what it was called, summit, I think with, Tony Robbins and Dean Grazioso, right?

[00:30:37] Cat: And it was amazing. And they were talking about getting into smaller groups and studying with a really specialized mentor in what you want to do. And they're talking about their programs. But I just kept thinking about Cathy. It was like I was in the room with her. She had entered my soul. And then I started talking to another woman who was a horsewoman who works for Cathy now, but at the time she was, you and I. And just the next thing I knew, I was totally signing up for the retreat

[00:31:07] Aneta: That's so crazy. So I had an interesting experience at the retreat because for me, just being there alone and traveling alone, it actually was really good. And I felt when I do that, and I have some alone time outside of the home and outside of my space, I'm just reflective and I get great ideas. I feel so creative. But, the days, the two days were so amazing because I met you and I met other folks, Joanna and some others, it was just such an interesting way of connecting with other like-minded people. And I think there may be two guys in the entire room, it was all women, but yet everybody was so supportive and everyone was there for the same reason and really just interested in hearing each other's stories. And then of course all the guests that she had. But I was so moved, as you said, by the pause, breathwork session that we did. And, I think that's why I actually ended up being there. I got so much out of the two days and so many close relationships that I know I'll have forever. But, when Sam Scully came and led us through this breathwork session, I'd been doing breathwork for a long time. I teach yoga and meditation and mindfulness and so have experience with a lot of breathwork, but not somatic breathwork. And when she let us through that, I was just bawling and there was nothing going on. There was nothing that I came up with that I needed to sort of release that I was aware of. But there was just something happening and it was such a spiritual knowing that was so interesting. And I remember going back to the room that night because I was exhausted. I think you and I both we're staying in. I'm going to eat a little salad in my room and go to bed. I remember watching one of her videos followed her on Instagram. There was no hard sell from the stage. She didn't even say I've got this program. I don't think she said any of that. I just watched her video, followed her on Instagram and then I was, I want to learn if I think I might want to teach this. I think I might want to be a facilitator. And, someone from our program contacted me immediately and was hey, we have a program that starts Monday and I was definitely not thinking of signing up for something else, but I took the call at seven forty-five California time because we were starting, we were leaving I think at 8:15 to go to day two. And I, for some reason, my head was saying, no, no, no, no, no, you need a break. Focus on your podcast, and do all this stuff. And my heart and my spirit were saying, yeah, of course, you're going to do this. I just kept feeling this, yes. And so I said yes. And I'm telling you it has been and is absolutely amazing. It's a six-month program. I don't graduate till April. But, already. It's made such a huge, profound difference in my life that I'm incorporating it in some of my meditation classes and with my coaching clients because it is so transformative. And so I think the relationships and also that program is why I was there. And also a reminder of what Cathy talks a lot about abundance, money blocks, and money mindset and really releasing any sort of doubts that you have, especially when you're in entrepreneurship. So tell me a little bit about what you got at the live, and then I want to hear what happened at the retreats and then what were some of your big a-has?

[00:34:26] Cat: First of all, I don't think we can leave the breathwork conversation. Because I feel it can be so hard. It's the same as getting into the resonance of actually touching a horse, right? But, I know you're at the very beginning of it your studies. But can you give us one little exercise? What's one? Because I keep coming back to that breath we did, which correct me if I'm not remembering it right, but it's-

[00:35:01] Aneta: Yes. There are some breath works that are definitely more meditative and so they have integrative and meditative and so we're learning the different types right now and also the length of and the meditative ones are over eight minutes. So if you're doing breath work for longer than eight minutes, it's going to definitely wake up your nervous system. And we did that with Sam, so of course we have that, tremendous sense of release. And then there's the integrative, which is eight minutes or less. And you could do some of the more vigorous, exercises, or you could do the ones that are just a little bit more gentle, inhaling through the nose and then just sighing out the breath, a cleansing breath, and releasing it. And then as you said, in some of the deeper ones, you can do, two inhales through the nose and a more vigorous exhale through the mouth. So, that just creates so much heat. I feel like even doing it. But the most important thing we've learned so far, and there's so much that we're learning you said something earlier, it's just really dropping into your body and connecting with yourself. And so just closing your eyes if it feels safe, and just allowing yourself to tune in and just say, I am safe where I am. And then checking in to see and ask yourself. Sometimes I place my hands on my heart because I love to feel the breath and feel the heartbeat and just say, what do I need right now? Do I need something that's more meditative? Do I need something that's more rigorous in order to release some stale energy, move some things through, and allow our intuition and our highest self to actually answer that question is so important. And when teaching someone or doing that for someone else, holding the space to really feel the energy and together to decide what makes sense here? What are we going to do? So, I said very early on, I'm two weeks in, but, it has just been amazing. And, it's trauma-informed, which is really important. So there are a lot of languages that, are important and it is very transformative and body aware. So, I can't wait to start doing more of it. We had to write our vision of how we're going to incorporate it into our life and our business. And so, I definitely see this in retreats that I'm going be building and, as I said, in existing programs and some new things too. So I'm very excited.

[00:37:48] Cat: Very cool. Well, I hope maybe you could come up to Hidden Ranch or we could do something virtual.

[00:37:55] Aneta: I would love it. I would love it. Of course. So tell me, you still haven't shared with me what happened after I came back home and you went to Cathy's house. How many of you guys were there?

[00:38:08] Cat: Okay. Let's see. I think the first day it was 12 or 13 of us in the morning maybe.

[00:38:15] Aneta: Okay. All right. And then did everyone stay? Do you guys stay all three days or-

[00:38:20] Cat: Yeah. So do you want to hear what happened?

[00:38:22] Aneta: I do. Of course. I want to hear what happened.

[00:38:25] Cat: First of all, I think I just want to make sure. I piggyback off of what you said about the lives because, one thing that I found, was the Cathy Heller live event, which I think about that one as live. And then the retreat. The retreat because it was just for three days with, a much smaller group of people. And it was a bit confusing for me because some people were there for the retreat and then just meeting the Cathy Heller community, and I think 200, 300 of us, I'm not sure. And being so lit up. I mean, just so lit up by it. It was really for me the first day when we were on the rooftop and we did Sam's breathing and we heard the interview with her best friend and we talked to the stylist and we had Sherry talk about her health journey with kids. I mean, it was,

[00:39:23] Aneta: It was amazing.

[00:39:24] Cat: Woah! And then, and so I've been talking about it as it's like night and day because that was the day on top of the roof and we saw crows flying and all of the choppers. And then we went into a theater during the day, but it was like-

[00:39:39] Aneta: Yes, the Grammy Theater, day two.

[00:39:41] Cat: The Grammy Theater, which is kind of a big deal. It was so funny because I'd had all of this, and I don't remember if we chatted about this a little bit but, being in my head going into, what about our luggage?

[00:39:55] Cat: And we had all this stuff about what are we going to do with the luggage? And we were going to try to keep it in one girl's place and I'd been reaching out to the organizers and ultimately, the luggage worked itself out. I wasn't the only one with luggage. There were bags of all of these amazing ladies who were flying out that night. As you left right at, and by way was over at 6 or 7, just so you know. Maybe we didn't get to say goodbye because it happened. And the performances and just hearing Cathy sing and seeing her, and her sharing with us as an artist. Really seeing her as a musician, this very special gift of her voice, but also her song. It was really powerful for me. So I love that experience. And we had a weekend before the retreat, which started on Monday. And I spent it with one of my oldest friends. I don't know if you remember on Friday my voice, I was losing my voice a little bit. Well, I had left, my husband and children a day early. I don't know if I told you this part. Did I tell you this?

[00:40:57] Aneta: No.

[00:40:58] Cat: Because they were sick, okay. And I was a little bit worried that maybe I was kind of getting it, but if I could get there and have a day by myself and just rest in the hotel, which is what I did, I might be okay. So then I went and spent this weekend with my oldest friend and we went shopping and this skirt that I'm wearing because, on the last day of the retreat, we were supposed to wear white and or beige. And, we did a lot of catching up and talking. Running around. And on Sunday afternoon I went to the beach with my cousin and my aunt, my cousin's fiance. And we talked and we caught up and I started losing my voice even more.

[00:41:38] Cat: And then, while at the beach, I had my first really bad cough attack and I started to realize, we had Covid right after that horse competition. We tested positive for Covid in September. We also tested positive for Covid in May this year. So anyways, blah, blah, blah. Everybody has a covid story. But with ours, we got better. And then when we started doing a lot of activity, going to those two days of the Cathy Heller live, and then all us talking. It would kind of make these comebacks. I mean it was just textbook-long Covid symptoms. So I knew, well, I'm not contagious. But I just, I don't feel a hundred percent right. I really don't feel a hundred percent. So that morning of the retreat, my friend left and I had been having a zinc lozenge, and I thought that I hadn't really eaten much yet because we were having food at the retreat and I just didn't feel very good. And I thought, well maybe it was because of the zinc?

[00:42:34] Cat: I get to the retreat and we do our first meditation. And Cathy's house is gorgeous by the way. But, it's gorgeous. I mean, you just can't even believe it. And I had this amazing ride with this Uber driver. I just had an incredibly similar to what you were saying, just to echo that. I think women when we are married, we have children, we have, maybe animals. We have a household, we have a lot going on. When we carve out time and space to go do something by ourselves overnight far away. And leave all of that behind. We have so much energy for whatever it is that the spirit wants to bring through us. So much energy. So that's what was happening to me and the flip side was I had in my luggage this sickness. I mean, I was sick. And so in that first meditation, I get there and I was a little bit off talking to people and I remember saying to this one girl because the cough started to come up, I've discovered the best thing with this cough is if I don't talk. Like if I'm quiet. And she was like, that's so interesting because I know someone else who has long covid and it comes on when they start talking too much. So we go into our first meditation and I have this horrible cough attack, Aneta, it's horrible. I realize I've got to leave. And so I go into the bathroom and I'm literally on my knees and put in a sucky drop trying to get it together. And also feeling, when you cough post-2020, it's not like when you coughed in 2019. People aren't, you got a cough, are you alright? People are like-

[00:44:18] Aneta: What's wrong with you? Yeah. Let me cover up.

[00:44:20] Cat: It's an intimate space. When someone coughs in a theater of 200 or 300 people, well you're going to expect that, right? But this, this kind of cough, it was not good. And at lunch, the same thing. I felt I'm going to sort of sit over here and eat by myself to avoid talking right now. So you can see where this might be going. So at the end of the day, the retreat was amazing. We had a lot of spotlights. Amy Purdy was there in the morning. Cathy let us through a walking meditation outside. The food was incredible. Just the energy of actually being in space together and women who are doing the deep dives. So a group of us were staying at an Airbnb together and they all went out to dinner. But I just need to rest. And, my roommate was a doctor.

[00:45:10] Cat: Perfect. So anyways, I took a bath, I rested, I filled out, and then in the morning, I woke up and I was all right, I think I'm feeling okay. Kind of, but actually I meditated and then I was actually, I really don't feel good. I really don't feel good. And I had this horrible headache and the sinuses, I mean the whole thing. And I realized, I can try to power through this and show up. And it was the day doing breathwork, right? And every ounce of my being, I mean, I spent so much money, on this retreat and here I am. I literally was so sick And I felt there are two things going on here. One is I really don't feel good myself, I wouldn't go to work today. And number two, I don't want to expose other people. I don't think that I'm contagious, but I am definitely disruptive with the cough and so I called my friend who works for Cathy Heller now and said, I'm really sick and I don't know what to do, and I show up and wear a mask. Right. Or I'm wondering what you can do for me. So, that's what happened.

[00:46:22] Aneta: So you stayed, did you go back home? Did you just not go back to Cathy's? What happened?

[00:46:28] Cat: So, yeah. So interesting and this is where, I don't know, what are your sick policies for your business? If you were to say, run a retreat and someone came down, the story I'm sharing with you, would you refund them?

[00:46:45] Aneta: Of course

[00:46:46] Cat: But what percentage?

[00:46:47] Aneta: The entire thing for me, something happens like that and, there are so many other expenses that you've incurred at that point, you are not able to take advantage of the program. I mean, it's a big-ticket item. It's a big amount. I mean, I shouldn't even judge, everything is a big amount for people who are making an investment, right? You traveled, you're away from your children, you've got all this stuff. So yeah, I would've just been, here's your refund and I hope you can come back, or, here's a credit and we'd love for you to come back next time when you feel better.

[00:47:22] Cat: Yeah. That's what I wanted, was a credit. Right. I wanted to, figure out how to reschedule and come back. It was pretty wild. But my takeaway and what I realized that day was, what's worth $10,000, Aneta? What you would pay $10,000 for a drop of a hat? You wouldn't even think about it.

[00:47:41] Aneta: Of course, you'd pay anything for it.

[00:47:43] Cat: And it was so simple. You're sick. It didn't even, the dollar amount on some level didn't even matter.

[00:47:52] Aneta: Well, and also, with your own programs. If you're ever in this situation, it's interesting to think about, what would you do. And I do retreats, I did one retreat, it was in Portugal and I plan to do another retreat probably in Italy this upcoming fall. And it's an interesting question what happens when you are making decisions about capacity and rooms and food and all that stuff? And yeah, it's never easy. But I am always there on the side of keeping the clients happy because you want them to be lifelong clients that do things and you want them to feel really good about it. I mean, you obviously didn't feel good about the situation because you were sick. It's not the outcome that you were looking for.

[00:48:37] Cat: It was brutal. Well, and so what was interesting is what I ended up doing with it because I was in this creative space. I made these videos about being sick. I didn't talk. It was what I actually needed a silent retreat to just take care of myself. A lot of us need that.

[00:48:59] Aneta: We do. I think that that was some of the best memories I had actually when I wasn't at the retreat. And I had these ideas that I was going to go out and join women for dinner and all these things, but knowing myself as an introvert, I woke up early because I'm on East Coast time, so I'm up super early and I went for a walk for an hour and a half. I just went up and down Sunset Boulevard. I went down side streets. I'm talking, to people on the sidewalk who just enjoyed being out in nature. And that quiet alone time. And then in the evenings, I loved going back to my room and just unwinding and reading or watching something on Netflix and just totally chilling out because that was part of the experience too. It's you can't always be at this level of energy and high, and then you need your nervous system to rest. You need to be able to soak it in, sort of Shavasana at the end of a yoga class. You need that time to return to yourself and allow everything that you did to just settle in, that's just as important, sometimes more important. So maybe for you, it's exactly what you needed.

[00:50:10] Cat: Well, and then get this. So then I came home and the same thing in hindsight, I wonder if I should have stayed one more day because of the airplane ride home. And I'm only sharing this because I'm sure there's somebody out there who needs to hear it and know they're not alone. But I got to the airport in California and I'm wearing masks and everything and, I see a sign saying, don't come into the airport or board a plane if you have an active cough. And I'm not really coughing, but I am keeping the sucky drops going on. Sure enough. I'm sitting in the center seat position of the three. And luckily, the seatbelt sign is off and the cough attack starts to come on. And I went into the bathroom and closed the door and wasn't on my knees in there, but I had to let it have its way with me, right? To its sleep. And then I came out and the flight attendant was there and she said, are you okay? And I realized I'd probably been in there for a little while. I mean, I was coughing. It was a very humbling, experience to go through that. And again, I think it was long covid. I don't think that I was contagious. And I think they say 50 to 60% of people have long covid symptoms. So I came home. I was really sick that night. We were supposed to go to a dog competition. Our dog's first competition. He's a two-year-old. This whole thing with the breeders was a couple of hours away and I had to stay home. I was that sick. So it kind of this snowball effect of catching up to my body needing to

[00:51:50] Aneta: Release, two-year-old what's so interesting that what came to mind for me as you were talking is, how we resist things that we don't want, right? So you think of, okay, maybe I'm starting to feel I might get sick. I don't want to get sick. Let me go early, and then all of these steps that we take to resist where the outcome is there waiting for us anyway. And coughing is one of those things because I've been exactly where you are. And, I wasn't sick, but it was definitely months after I had Covid and I was, having a coughing attack on an airplane. And also I think the change in going from Chicago to California, even for me coming from Cleveland to California, I felt that there were some allergies and things that were happening, so I think that could have been part of that too. But you cannot resist that cough. It just will take over. And so whatever you needed to release and whatever it was coming up, it seemed it was very physical and maybe it was a little emotional too, right? You can't hold onto it. You just had to let it go.

[00:53:03] Cat: Yeah. Well, I go back to that moment, I mean, literally that morning. I felt terrible after my meditation. And, I was reflecting on it, journaling later that day and frankly giving myself a little bit of a pat on the back because it took a lot of bravery to say, I'm actually too sick to come. I need to make this call. And that was interesting. And, the other thing, going back to what you were saying, this idea, was a piece of it because I literally made a course about being sick. Talk about keeping it simple. My daughter was saying, mommy being sick is just a part of life. Why she's saying that? She's parroting what I'm telling her. Because it is a part of life. In the same way that our bodies wax and wane. We are going to go through having colds, coughs, horrible, debilitating headaches, etcetera. And I agree. Who knows how much of that was emotional or spiritual or psychological processing, but it was fully in my body. I mean, it was a total physical manifestation, I could not believe it. Yeah. And hey, guess what? You met me in my Wonderwoman. That's what it is. Not superwoman.

[00:54:15] Aneta: Wonderwoman. That's right. Yes.

[00:54:18] Cat: Turns out I'm not Wonderwoman Aneta. And none of us are, we're human.

[00:54:26] Aneta: Even Wonderwoman, right? You take off the cuffs and, and her lasso, right? So we've got some of those tools. They're just not always readily available. So sometimes you just got to put it down.

[00:54:41] Cat: So here's a question for you. Have you ever thought about, to this day will always visualize you on that rooftop in that beautiful green dress? But what is your superpower outfit like?

[00:54:58] Aneta: I don't know if I have, I'm not really good at it. My niece and nephew, and I, were having this conversation today, actually. I don't watch a lot of cartoons or even those movies, so I have no idea who the superheroes are, but I'll tell you. I've got a couple of different superpowers, I think. So one is, I am very intuitive and I think I can feel people's energies. And people have told me, and I do feel this way as I can connect with people and just seem to either hold space or give them what they need at the moment. And sometimes it's just holding space, sometimes it's listening, sometimes it's, actually sharing whatever comes to me as a divine download, and I am a nerd and I geek out over creating routines. I am a systems and routine process person. I'm obsessed with it. And for some reason I can listen to someone's life and go, okay, here's what I would do, and let's get you super organized and add the things in and this will make your life easier, I do love that. So that's very tactical, so I'd say one is super tactical and the other one is maybe spiritual, or emotional. And I do love to read and listen to podcasts and I have the ability to retain a lot of that information and then bring it back and give someone just maybe the right, Bible verse or meditation or whatever it is. So those are some of my superpowers that, I consider myself grateful and blessed to be able to use every single day. So I think that's definitely a gift. And I didn't have it before when I did something else for my career. But How about you? What would you say yours?

[00:56:41] Cat: Well, first of all, just to reflect what I hear, and what I see when you share that like I see, okay, so right now I see behind you, are plants. So I think grounded, but you were talking intuitive and spiritual and Christian and knowing things about people. So I see all this sort of ethereal. Mother Mary kind of out there, write the halo and then the book smarts and being organized with your glasses. Right. And the beautiful jewelry. I see that connection to, and just books and grounded and I can't see, but you have a microphone there, books, this is where

[00:57:16] Aneta: There are books everywhere, all around. Yeah.

[00:57:19] Cat: I can see from the shelving too. The plants are growing and, but in a pot and how much water they need. Really you're a gardener. I can tell from here.

[00:57:30] Aneta: I do love the plants and I talk to them of course because they're live things. It's so interesting. I'm a florist, which is an earth sign. And so I do love very grounded but also love all of the beauty for life, strong zest for life. I want the good wine and the good chocolate and the great food and, do like nice things and lots of books, but all of this stuff that's, I don't know, just an appreciation for beauty everywhere. Aneta: For people and in things, but not materially. I'm not an accumulator of those things, but just a good appreciation of the things that bring me joy could be my favorite mug or something. It doesn't have to be anything fancy.

[00:58:11] Cat: Yeah. But the finer things in life, sort of like, I think Cathy brings that in. I mean, look at the incredible people she connected us all to, and the other thing, what you just shared, I just see the cloud, It's so grounded and yet you see it all and what's available. So I just want to share that if I were to draw you

[00:58:30] Aneta: Thank you. You're so sweet,

[00:58:32] Cat: Because I'm an artist Right? But I think each of us, and you didn't share this, but going back to the cloud breath. Because that's growing, that's going to be, and I just being able to blow away what doesn't belong there. Right? To help someone. You were talking about what you do with your clients, see what they really need to get to the level.

[00:58:55] Aneta: You were so sweet. Back at you.

[00:59:00] Cat: And, mine is really simple, but it's the cowgirl with the kids and the horses around and just dogs and mountains and ready to go and all the tools for adventure. Water paddles, ropes, and really good snacks

[00:59:19] Aneta: I think that this is what I want for everyone, and this is what I want for my daughters, but I want this for all, every single one of my clients, my friends, for everyone to be able to say, what do I love? And what are my gifts, my talents, and my experience? Let's not waste a single lesson, right? Use it all for good. Use it all to help yourself, your family, to help others. And I mean, I think that's part of the journey of life is just taking all of those things, learning from it, and just continuing to elevate. And I always say fill yourself up with your own light. Let it shine so brightly that every single person you come into contact with goes, I see it and I see it in myself, and I'm going to go share. I mean, that's what namaste is, right? The light in me honors and sees and respects the light in you, and we pass it forward to others, and then suddenly I think that's how we light up this world, right? You receive it.

[01:00:21] Cat: I got it. I feel it. Feeling it.

[01:00:25] Aneta: Cat, I want to ask you a question, and it's based on the title of this podcast, which is Live the Width of Your Life. And, I want to know what that means to you and how you do that in your own life.

[01:00:37] Cat: Honestly, Anneta, I feel you just, shared exactly what I would say. So to reflect it back to you, what are you going to remember on your deathbed? It's probably not the job title. It's not, I mean, when Amy Purdy talked about her near-death experience, right? Yeah. Going and coming back. She said it was the smell of campfire. It was the tinny taste of tap water. Those are sensorial, those are actually us in our bodies. So for me, it's being with horses, it's that love, this soul connection, right? This soul connection is priceless. Meaning you are worth $10,000. I mean, It's not even about that. Right. So for me, the width, the word I keep thinking about, and its interesting width because of waistlines, all of that. Also, it's the depth. Right?

[01:01:40] Cat: But it's the height. To me, it's all-encompassing. All those things you love fill up your soul. A quote, and I don't remember who says it, but Cathy always says it and whoever says it, but we need more people who have come alive. What really sets your soul on fire? Do that thing.

[01:02:03] Aneta: Yeah. I love that. And I know that's how you live your life. Can see it in you. And I wish everyone could feel, I'm sure they can hear it through, this call, this podcast session. But just to see it in person too, it's so amazing. So tell us a little bit more about your programs, how we can best support you, and where we can follow you. If people are interested and curious, which I know that they are about, your programs and services.

[01:02:30] Cat: Yeah, so you can find me on my website, which is just my name, Cat Caldwell Myers. And it's Cat with a C, Meow Cat, catcaldwellmyers.com so I always say Myers, me oh my different ways to spell Myers. And, I have a podcast coming out in January.

[01:02:55] Aneta: Exciting. Tell me what the name of it

[01:02:57] Cat: It's horses, mountains, and Dogs, Oh my. I was chuckling thinking about this the other day because it kind of came from lions, tigers, and bears. Oh my. Right. But those are things we're afraid of. Horses, mountains, and dogs. Those are the things that my soul runs to. And some people are attracted to that. And be fair, I mean, in the Midwest some people are afraid of those things too. And there are people who are tiger whisperers, you know what I mean?

[01:03:33] Cat: Right. It's all relative and I mean, to me, those are the things that wake up my soul, wake up the soul of my clients. I'm working on leading retreats back to dude ranches out west in Wyoming this summer. We might do Colorado and New Mexico also. And then here at Hidden Ranch, which is outside of Chicago.

[01:03:55] Aneta: Well, I'll be there at least at one of them. I'm so curious. And of course, I would trust you to take me out.

[01:04:01] Cat: The level of trust and communication and what you can sense. And the last thing that I'll share with you, and of course, I have 90-day coaching programs and one-on-ones and all those things too. You can find all of that.

[01:04:14] Aneta: Cat you are such a gift. It's such a joy talking to you. I'm going to include all the details in the show notes. I want to thank you for coming on today and for those that are listening, if you enjoy today's episode, please, please, please share it with anyone else that you think would benefit from our conversation. Have the most amazing day, Cat. Best luck to you.

Podcast Outro:

[01:04:37] Aneta: If you enjoyed this episode and want a personalized guide to living the width of your life, I've just released a bestselling book Live the Width of Your Life, 365 Daily meditations on Living with passion, purpose, and peace. Each daily meditation provides you with a journal prompt or a challenge so you can begin taking daily imperfect action toward the life of your dreams. You can get your copy today on Amazon. The link is in the show notes, and I will see you next time.