What if your FEARS aren’t real?

What if your FEARS aren’t real?

“Your life is the expression of the limit of your thoughts.” - Prem Sadasivananda, Empower Your Life

I’ve been thinking a lot about one of our biggest distractors, something that steals joy from our lives — and that is FEAR!  I re-watched a TED Talk by Tim Ferris on facing our fears and leveraging Stoicism as a philosophy to help us live better lives.  I didn’t know who Tim Ferris was at the time, but his story really inspired me because of the way he approached his fearful thoughts.  

He created a template to list his fears, examine what could happen, identify the mitigation plan to reduce the risk, and then he did another analysis on the upside potential. What could happen, what would he give up if he continued to embrace the status quo?  

Our monkey brain spends a lot of time on worst case scenarios that paralyze us with fear and inaction.   If we could logically examine those fears, have plans in place that reduce the perceived risk, and then push through to visualize the benefits of going through with the plans, then we would be much more likely to do the very things that scare us the most.  

I have learned that facing those things that scare us the most is where we should typically be running towards.  I heard again that we are born with only two fears. The first is the fear of loud noises and the second is the fear of falling.  Seems like two good things to be hard-wired with to protect ourselves from physical harm. The other fears we have are accumulated and learned over time.  Isn’t that incredible?  As a result of our parents, education, friends, media, etc., we learn to be afraid of other things, and are trained to seek comfort instead. 

I did this exercise myself after I watched the TED Talk and it was life-changing.  I have that exercise documented and go back to it often when I am fearful of doing something new.  I can look back and recognize that none of my fears came true, and instead by choosing to take action instead of being paralyzed by my fears, I was able to grow and have amazing experiences instead. 

I do this exercise with all of my coaching clients.  It’s an eye-opener to write down our fears on paper and then to write what we would be giving up on if we chose to stay afraid. 

Here’s how to do this exercise yourself:

1. Write down all of your fears — get everything down on paper

2. Answer “what if the complete opposite of this fear was the truth instead?”  — what would that look like?

3. How could you mitigate the risk or associated with this fear?

4. What would you be giving up on if you choose to stay fearful and not take action?

My hope is that this exercise exposes some illogical thinking and that you do some amazing new things instead!  We have such a limited time here, this world needs what you have to offer. 

Taylor Swift, inspiration and creation

Taylor Swift, inspiration and creation

2020 has not been the year that many of us expected when we made plans for the Roaring 20s or the Best Decade ever.  It’s been a challenging year for most, and much harder for others who have suffered illness and loss.  And yet Taylor Swift just released what I, and actual music critics, think is her best album yet.  

It’s easy to think of celebrities and artists as special or different from the rest of us, however, 2020 has not spared anyone.  Like many of us, her year didn’t start off as expected.  She said in interviews, “Most of the things I had planned this summer didn’t end up happening.”  She had to reschedule her Lover Fest shows promoting her last album, and she missed headlining this year’s Glastonbury Festival because the concert was cancelled.  

If she spent time in suffering, it couldn’t have been for long because she began working on this album in April, and released it in July.   She turned her focus, her attention, and her energy to what she does best - she wrote great songs.  “In isolation my imagination has run wild and this album is the result.” 

I am inspired that she could experience the same grief and disappointment that many of us have experienced this year and still release her album Folklore in 4 months.  I am impressed that she did all of this in isolation without the benefit of the standard process it takes to create an album. 

She is not the only one who created during challenging times.  During the plague of 1606 in London, William Shakespeare wrote King Lear, Macbeth, and Antony and Cleopatra while in quarantine.  I know that Taylor Swift and William Shakespeare were not homeschooling their children while they were creating, however, it still made me think about my own year and whether I was living and creating fully.  It’s easy to distract ourselves and seek comfort, but what if in that distraction we were missing a huge opportunity that would be more fulfilling? 

• What if we each decided to live our own lives with the same intention, inspiration and wonder?  

• What if we didn’t wait to do the things that we’ve been putting off? 

• What if we sought progress over perfection?  

• What if we created, built, and experienced things NOW because we see each day as a gift?   

• And, what if we didn’t wait for the perfect time to fully live our lives?  

“Before this year I probably would’ve overthought when I release this music at the ‘perfect’ time, “But the times we’re living in keep reminding me that nothing is guaranteed.  My gut is telling me that if you make something you love, you should just put it out into the world.” - Taylor Swift 

What if 2020 is meant to be the year that we grow, transform, and reach our highest potential? What will be your masterpiece this year?

What your food cravings are trying to tell you

What your food cravings are trying to tell you…

Our bodies are innately intelligent.  When we are healthy, we don’t have to remember to breathe, or tell our organs to work, or to adjust our body temperature.  We heal when we cut ourselves, sleep to renew and restore our energy, and make internal adjustments constantly to keep ourselves in balance.  

However, we tend to beat ourselves up when we experience food cravings, especially for things that aren’t healthy.  What if we instead examined our cravings and asked ourselves “What is my body trying to tell me?” 

Our cravings are signals that we might need to restore balance in our lives. Let’s examine some common sources of cravings:

1. Dissatisfaction with other aspects of our lives

Are you dissatisfied with a relationship or your job?  Are you bored and in need of new hobbies or activities that inspire you?  Many of us eat emotionally to compensate for imbalances in other areas of our lives. Food may be our drug that temporarily fills a void and distracts us in the moment from things that are more difficult to examine. 

2. Water intake

Sometimes when we think we are hungry, we’re actually dehydrated.  Drinking at least half of our body weight in water is a great way to reduce cravings, regulate our portions, flush out our systems, and to make healthier choices throughout the day. 

3. Craving food from your childhood 

When we are stressed and seeking comfort, we can crave foods that we ate during our childhood that made us happy and filled an emotional need.  I know for me eating my mom’s crepes takes me back to childhood breakfasts when I didn’t have a care in the world.  You may also crave foods that you recently ate that are associated with a happy memory.  When you crave these foods, examine if you are craving the food itself or the comfort and memory that the food represents. 

4. Seasonal foods

Our bodies tend to crave foods that are in season at the moment.  Right now, you may be cravings ice cream and barbecue.  However, summertime is a great time to take advantage of the fresh produce at farmer’s markets and swap out fresh fruit instead of ice cream and salad instead of heavier side dishes.  

5. Lack of nutrients

Our bodies crave balance and sometimes our cravings may indicate a lack of certain nutrients.  Do you crave salty snacks after you work out?  Perhaps your electrolytes are depleted.  Did you know that your chocolate craving may be tied to a magnesium deficiency, and red meat cravings may be tied to iron deficiency.  Examine recurring cravings and talk to your medical provider or health coach about any concerns.

6. Stress and hormonal changes

Stressful times, especially like those during the past few months, can lead us to emotionally eat.  Be kind to yourself, examine your cravings and see if they are telling you something.  

I have 4 free health coaching consultations left this month.  Book your free call with me today!